All posts by Joseph

Mack.

Macky
Macky (2004 – 2022)

Lost my best friend today. Though my heart is broken, all I can say is that I was fortunate beyond words to know this little guy. Absolutely the sweetest, best-natured little fellow I ever knew. We tried to give him the best life we could offer, and I don’t regret a single moment of the last fifteen years.

I’ve got a lot more to say about Macky, but I’ll save it and just share this lyric Matt wrote decades ago – one that sums up how I felt about my boy. It’s a song called Natural Laws.

The other day you looked so small
Standing by the bonsai tree
I was sure you’d be taken by the breeze
I’ve got some nylon rope, and I bought some iron spikes
I’m going to hold you down if it’s the last thing I do

Last night it was a dream that provoked you
I was lying next to you just watching you turn
I would have awakened you if I thought you’d be better off
I would have awakened you if I thought I could make you safe


If words could make you safer
Then I would not hesitate


You’ll always have a room in my house
You’ll always have a chamber of my heart
You’re more than welcome to anything I have
Just help yourself to my frozen food or anything


If I controlled the natural laws
If I could make you safer
If I controlled the natural laws
Then I would not hesitate

What’s that they’ve written all up and down the wall?
Something about suction and my face
I don’t know what they mean or why it’s illustrated in green
Is it some tasteless reference to my love for you?

The other day you looked so small
Standing by the bonsai tree

If I controlled the natural laws
If I could make you safer
If I controlled the natural laws
Then I would not hesitate

(c) Matthew Perry

Getting a good-ISH start on another year

2000 Years to Christmas

Oh, damn, I did it again. Can’t stop writing 2021 when I mean 2022. It’s like I’m trying to go back in time. And why the hell would ANYONE want to go back to 2021? I mean, aside from Mitch Macaphee?

Yeah, Mitch had a pretty good year last year. He made some stuff blow up real good. The rest of us, however … not so much. We made things blow up, but not intentionally. And I have to say, this drafty old abandoned hammer mill is no place to spend January. If we were as rich as … well, as pretty much any other band, we could just pick this place up, put it on a flatbed, and move it someplace warm. But no how, my friends, no freaking how.

Random ways to stay warm

Okay, so when the heat is not so hot, how do you keep from turning into a band-cicle? Well, there are ways. One is to play your damn instruments. That’s what we do typically when the iceman calleth. I start banging on my acoustic guitar, beating the living shit out of it with my pick-less paw, raising callouses and annoying the neighbors with my hollering. (If you want to know what THAT sounds like, give my recent nano concerts a listen. )

Sometimes when it gets particularly frosty, I’ll play covers, like old Neil Young songs or numbers by Elvis Costello, Stones, Jethro Tull, etc. Some of it’s a little hard to render on a solo acoustic guitar, but I don’t let THAT stop me. What I can’t do is a credible version of Matt’s song Why Not Call It George, which we used to do with the full band. Our guitar player Jeremy Shaw used to do a volcanic solo on that song – holy cats! If that doesn’t warm you up, I don’t know what will.

I'm frozen solid

Through the trackless wastes

Now, as everybody knows, January is a very quiet time for bands here in upstate New York. That’s always been the way, since grand-daddy was knee-high to a grasshopper’s grandaddy. Of course, now it’s even worse with COVID, though that doesn’t stop some people from going out and making it rain in a club somewhere. That’s fine, guys … just don’t breathe while you’re there and you’ll be fine.

We of Big Green tend to prefer our solitude. And who the hell needs the money, right? I mean, besides us? We can always ask Marvin (my personal robot assistant) to manufacture some cash for us. He’s got one of those inkjet printers built into his ass. (Not literally his ass, you understand – just a figure of speech.) And if he just refrains from putting Art Linkletter in the president hole of the bills, someone might actually accept them as legal tender. (Hope so – it’s a long slog to Spring.)

Extraordinary means

Now, one of the benefits of having a mad science advisor is that, when you can’t afford to run the central heat, he or she can come up with some technical solution that will keep you from freezing to death. Yesterday Mitch Macaphee somehow managed to build a fire in the forge room of the mill. Only it wasn’t something impressive, like a flame generated by a concentrated tachyon beam. He literally just pulled beams out of the mill roof and threw them in the fire.

What a freaking luddite! I expect some kind of miracle cure to our hypothermia, not burning the house down one plank at a time!

Examining the Three Crises Three

I’m guessing none of you noticed, but I returned to podcasting a week or so ago. It was a slight return, a special episode of Strange Sound – special in the sense that there was no music and no editing to speak of. We had just passed the anniversary of January 6, and I had a bee in my bonnet. Either that or a rat up my ass. Not really sure which.

Anyway, in this special episode I expounded on what I call the Three Crises Three. It’s a bit like the political version of the Three Mustaphas Three, except less funny and no music whatsoever. My main point was that we as a society are facing three very serious crises simultaneously – crises that fuel one another in a toxic feedback loop of destruction. And hell, that can ruin your whole day.

What are these Three Crises Three? Let us discuss them one by one:

Crisis One: The Coup

Though it sounds cliche to say so, we experiencing a crisis of democracy in the sense that our republican constitutional government is under serious threat. Now, I know our system is deeply flawed. The alternative, however, is not something better – it’s autocracy. The right is openly talking about this as a real possibility.

But they are doing more than talking. Last year they identified all of the trigger points in our electoral system (and there are many). This year and every year moving forward, they’re going to apply pressure at those points. They had a plan and it failed. But failed plans are good practice. Clearly, the Autocratic Party (formerly the Republican Party) is building toward a second attempt, starting with the election this fall.

Crisis Two: Trumpatosis

Yes, I call COVID-19 Trumpatosis … because he deserves it. This pandemic is literally killing us by the hundreds of thousands. It is also sickening millions more and rending the social fabric of our nation, making organizing and mutual aid much, much more difficult. The Democrats are proving themselves incompetent at coping with this crisis, failing to take the steps necessary to end it.

On the other hand, the Autocratic Party is the party of denial. They have been from the very beginning. They are building successful political careers on the basis of massive failure and negligence in their response to COVID. What’s more, the Autocrats will be hard to beat if progressive Democrats can’t engage in aggressive GOTV efforts in the upcoming elections. Which means no end in sight for this crisis.

Crisis Three: The Climate Catastrophe

This is the ticking time bomb. The climate crisis underscores the fact that our old model of politics is no good anymore. It the Autocrats take power, they will stop even the most flimsy action on climate change. They will further ramp up oil and gas extraction and restart Keystone XL and other fossil fuel infrastructure investments. We can’t afford that detour. In any previous decade, diversions of this kind could be endured, but now – with less than ten years left to address this crisis – it’s simply unacceptable.

I know that the left in America hates electoralism. They have good reason. But we simply need to do this thing. We need to turn back the political cycle this fall and send more progressives to Washington. It may not be sufficient to address these crises, but it is none the less necessary.

For more on this, give the current episode of Strange Sound a listen.

Check out our political opinion podcast, Strange Sound.