Bombastards. Israel’s hysterical use of largely U.S. supplied firepower continued unchecked this week, deepening the humanitarian crisis in the prison known as Gaza and raining destruction on a virtually defenseless Lebanon. On this side of the pond, pundits, ex-pols, and talking heads of every stripe are blathering their support of the indefensible. Long discredited ex-Speaker Newt Gingrich joined fellow armchair reactionaries Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity in describing this as World War III. (Hallucinogenic neo-con Michael Ledeen took time out from lobbying for war with Iran to announce the advent of something he calls “World War IV” – did I miss something?) Meanwhile, from his impregnable pillbox in the editorial pages of hundreds 
of U.S. newspapers – a safe distance from the fighting, to be sure – Chuck Krauthammer fulminated about how Israel is fighting for its life… though how a resistance organization of maybe 1,000 full-time fighters with second hand munitions can pose an existential threat to the world’s 4th most powerful military state (one with perhaps 300 nuclear weapons) is a bit of a mystery, frankly.
The U.S.’s position on this severe breach of the peace is clear – let the killing continue. Presidential spokesman and First Cousin Tony Snow told reporters that the president was not in favor of a cease fire that would leave Hezbollah in place, a sentiment later echoed by Secretary Rice. True to the traditional American position regarding Israel, we have blocked any meaningful action by the Security Council. So much for the Bush doctrine of promoting democracy in the Middle East. How many times have we heard junior babble on about how democracies don’t attack their neighbors? Well, the Israeli democracy is now destroying what was recently hailed by the administration as a budding democracy in Lebanon, effectively ensuring that the dominant political force in southern Lebanon, whether Hezbollah or some successor, will be even more hostile towards Israel. Meanwhile in Gaza, Israel is busily attacking the democratically elected Hamas government, killing its constituents and kidnapping its ministers – essentially an escalation of its ongoing policy since the “disengagement” from Gaza. Clearly our support for democracy is based more on outcomes than on principles. No surprises there.
Admiral Krauthammer’s second column of the week lamely attempted to frame Israel’s action in Lebanon as similar to the U.S. expulsion of Iraq from Kuwait in 1991. That’s probably the most ass-backwards analysis I’ve heard yet this year. If anyone here resembles Saddam Hussein’s wehrmacht it’s the IDF, unleashing the full fury of its arsenal on a far weaker nation, targeting civilian infrastructure, and killing hundreds of 
non-combatants so far. Not the first time, either. Furthermore, Hezbollah is anything but a foreign occupier of southern Lebanon, much as it may serve the neo-con paradigm to paint them as terror legions under orders from Tehran and Damascus. Hezbollah is an indigenous political organization deeply rooted in Lebanon’s Shi’a community, the nation’s single largest religious group comprising 40 percent of Lebanon’s population. Like Hamas, they are an Islamist group that has both political and military wings, and provides some level of basic services to a population that has been neglected by its own government and battered by the Israelis. It is Israel that is the invader, and it is they who will ultimately be driven out — now or ten years from now.
Oh…. and Iraq is going septic. But lucky for Rumsfeld, now there’s another major conflict squeezing it off of the front page.
So much for twenty questions. (Always hated that game!) Well, here we are in deep, deep shit… I mean, space, trying to feel our way from solar system to solar system without the benefit of anything even resembling a trained spacecraft pilot. Marvin (my personal robot assistant) keeps insisting that he knows how to drive this thing, but quite honestly… I can’t understand a word he’s saying, and unless he makes himself a bit clearer, I simply cannot risk putting all of our lives in his “hands” (actually claws, but you get me). Mitch Macaphee, our chief science advisor, claims to have a master’s license, and he has actually piloted us through this “middle passage” between solar systems before, but…. well…. he’s having a bit of a bender this week. Got his hands on some Neptunian schnapps during our showcase on Uranus and, well… the rest is history (or should I say nausea). Anyway, not a chance of letting him have the tiller. 
on him. The last time we let our Zenite guitarist take the reins, he took us on a scrape ’round the galaxy none of us are likely to forget. (As a pan-dimensional being of no fixed shoe size,
written into our standard contract that magma-based performance surfaces are not acceptable – John White insisted on that, and with good reason!) To top it all off, it turned out that the representative from Loathsome Prick Records was a real… well… loathsome prick. Who woulda thunk it? (You woulda? Hmmmmm….) 
what a great congressman Ray Meier would make is just the kind of free advertising the opposition needs. 
Speaking of the empire, things are really going septic just lately. If some kind of imperial order does exist, there is currently no one at the helm. Israel is pounding the living hell out of Gaza and Lebanon at the same time, while Hizbullah (in Lebanon) is vowing all out war on Israel in retaliation. They are, of course, a Shi’ite organization, and attacks on them will ripple through the majority population of Iraq, as well as Iran, Saudi Arabia, and elsewhere. Probably 100-150 million Shi’ia Muslims in the world, and I can’t think that very many of them are happy to see clerics’ homes being flattened and their children beheaded by Israeli munitions. Our official response? Israel has the right to offend itself. Did I get that right? Oh, yeah… a good offense is the best defense, right? So our way of helping is by lecturing the victims. That’s the stuff, Bolton. You tell ’em.