Tag Archives: Rick Perry

Usual Rubbish

Mail bag returns.

Mail's in!Well, it’s been a while. Time to open the Big Green mail bag again, at long last. It’s easy to forget this stuff with all that’s been on our plate the last couple of years. You know, production, minor building repairs, breathing (lots of breathing), and the like. But no matter – we’ll just take a moment away from all of that, wave away the moths, and pull the first missive from its tattered envelope.

Here’s one from Castleton-on-Hudson, NY:

Dear Big Green … Are you the same ne’er-do-wells that used to live in that broken down house on Green Avenue? You know … the one that looks like it tumbled halfway down the gorge and landed on its roof? Because it that WAS you guys, you friggin owe me money.

— Baldric McPlumber

Hey, Baldric … thanks for writing in! Yes, that was us, back in an earlier incarnation (or since we’re talking about rural New York, maybe it should be “inTARnation”). We lived in that broken down house in 1984-5, and next door to it in 1981, so if you have any outstanding bills, just hand them to the people currently occupying those structures. Cheers!

Here’s a note from someone in Madagascar:

Dear Big Green … Your last episode of Ned Trek featured a Mormon dentist by the name of Jillian Mustard. Do you know if she’s accepting any new patients? I’ve got a loose filling in one of my molars, lower left.

— Kranis Frackus

Hiya, Kranis … hope all is well in Madagascar! Nope, I don’t think Jillian is accepting any new patients. She is what we call a “fictional” character, cooked up in the sick, sick mind of my illustrious brother. Any resemblance to actual human beings, living or dead, is completely coincidental. (Unless the resemblance is way too close … in which case, you know who you are.)

One more … this one from San Antonio:

Howdy, partners! I see you posted a whole mess of songs about Rick Perry on your YouTube Channel. It’s almost as if you KNEW Rick was going to run for president again. What manner of beast are you that you can see things that haven’t happened yet?

— T-Bone Pickens

Well now, T-Bone. That there is what we New Yorkers call a “coincidence”. You see, not everything in this highly complex world is connected to every other thing. It’s just a happy accident that I got my lazy ass in gear and posted those songs just weeks before Rick made his fateful decision to throw his ten-gallon hat into the ring. Those songs offer a great backgrounder on the candidate. Don’t underestimate him!

There’s more, but then … you have a life.

Political Rants

News dump.

Well, it’s just been one of those weeks. For some reason, MSNBC has been choosing to spend enormous amounts of airtime on some football scandal (talk about a news dump!), but that notwithstanding, we at Big Green insist on full coverage.

Hey, governor ... Costello's supposed to be the funny one.Mess with Texas. I imagine you’ve heard by now that the great state of Texas is under threat of invasion and the imposition of marshal law by a socialist-slave U.S. military. You’ve heard, that is, if you spend most of your free time on paranoid right-wing nut-job web sites. This fantasy, rooted in the kind of conspiratorial blather that has animated the right since Obama’s election and before (remember Ruby Ridge?), is all the more bizarre because it is taking hold in a state that prides itself as being the home of many, many U.S. military personnel. All that flag-waving, and still Governor Greg Abbott feels it necessary to task his national guard with observing the upcoming special forces exercises. Freakish. Amazingly, these people think climate change is some elaborate conspiracy theory.

Favorite headline on this: Even Rick Perry thinks Greg Abbott is a dumbass (Dallas Voice).

Hebdo in Garland. A couple of pissed-off Muslims attempted to attack a Prophet Mohammed cartoon contest in Garland Texas, put on by a notorious anti-Muslim freakazoid. Next thing you know, you’ve got another free speech debate on your hands. Why is it that when people say you’re stupid for doing something stupid, you are accused of attacking their speech rights? I guess because it’s an easy defense. I don’t see those people lining up to defend journalists killed by Israeli Defense Forces bombs in Gaza last summer. So, as always, opinions on free speech in America are almost always driven by who is doing the speaking and what they are saying. If you do your best to provoke people who are marginalized and under constant pressure and suspicion, you will be defended to the ends of the earth for your rights. If you call out the powerful, don’t expect the same courtesy.

It’s a lot like the International Criminal Court. I’ll start having some faith in it when they haul Dick Cheney’s sorry ass up to the dock. Until them, don’t even talk about it.

Political Rants

Bugs in the system.

So the government’s Affordable Care Act web site doesn’t work. Does that surprise anyone? It’s a big, honking, outsourced engineering project that has had the budget axe swinging over it for the past three years. It’s been under constant threat of being defunded or declared unconstitutional, subjected to incessant political attack in Washington and around the country by a party dedicated to disabling it anyway that they can.

The fact is, the most dysfunctional part of the Affordable Care Act is Medicaid expansion, not because it doesn’t work but because half of the states in the union have refused to participate, even with 100% funding from the federal government. We hear so much about the Web site being a piece of shit (and rightfully so), and yet I don’t see anyone on the right wringing their hands over the fact that something like 7 million people, the vast Four star general in war on healthmajority of whom are working poor, will have no access to health coverage simply because the governors and legislatures in their state capitals are intent on making a political point. Throw needy (working!) families under the bus, and that’s fine. But build a buggy Web site? Unforgiveable!

It’s pretty clear, in fact, why Republicans are pulling the rug out from under their needy constituents. Chris Hayes interviewed an Ohio state representative on Wednesday night, and while the fellow tried his best to conceal his objection to Medicaid behind some blather about legislative process, he eventually got around to saying that Medicaid was a program people would get “locked into” because they would enjoy the benefit so much, it would be a disincentive for them to raise their standard of living to the point where they wouldn’t receive it anymore. Health coverage makes you lazy. The same old G.O.P. and conservative Democrat trope about welfare, still with us after all these years. They don’t like owning up to it, but it’s still there.

I have to say that this nationwide refusal by Republicans to sign on to Medicaid expansion is certainly one of the most craven domestic policy decisions I have witnessed in my adult life. Hearing them complain about a Web site would be laughable … if this were a laughting matter.

Once again – they’re the reason our kids are ugly.

luv u,

jp