Some people count to ten when they’re angry. Others resort to a punching bag or maybe a mattress stood up against the wall. I’ve known people to shut themselves in a closet and scream bloody murder. But THIS … THIS is outrageous.
Remind me, next time I start a band, don’t … repeat, don’t have a mad science advisor. Sure, they can help you out in a pinch, like that time we needed to get to that gig on Neptune and our van had broken down. Or that other time when I needed a personal robot assistant. Thing is, they are so freaking mercurial. (In Mitch Macaphee’s case, I think the reason for that may be that he just spent way too much time on the planet Mercury.) And when the act out, it can have profound consequences.
I’ve never even come close to being a scientist, but when I was a kid – like most American kids – I built a plaster volcano. Pretty sure Mitch did so when he was young, only his little ‘cano burned down his elementary school and his mates had to spend the rest of the semester attending class in a cornfield. Well … Mitch is at it again, apparently THIS time setting his sites on the Big Island in Hawaii. How do I know he’s the cause of the recent eruptions? Just have a feeling, that’s all. He’s been spending an awful lot of time in that lab of his. And I’ve been hearing a lot of rumbling just lately.
I always get a little nervous when Mitch starts messing around with plate tectonics. It recalls to my mind the protagonist in Matt’s song “Why Not Call It George?” – himself a kind of mad scientist, tinkering with the inner workings of our unruly little planet:
Continental drift can be reversed
Great tumblers shift
And Pangaea can be reclaimed
After me it can be renamed
Why not call it George?
Call it George, after me
While we don’t have a lot of tectonic activity in our neighborhood, it does get a little shaky once in a long while. And with Mitch Macaphee still pissed off about those NASA shots of Jupiter, I wouldn’t be surprised if those tremors get a little closer together. We might even wake up to aggravated volcanism, and I don’t mean the plaster variety. (Note to self: order those fireproof goulashes.)
Put The Phone Down – We start with some strained renditions of a song by The Troggs, as sung by Peter Lorre, the Daleks from Dr. Who, and others, then rip right into a discussion of current affairs. That more or less follows the theme of my political rant this week – the assholes vs. the fuckers, in essence, though we also spend some time on “Bernie or Bust” and the Green Party. (Don’t get me started!)
As I think I mentioned before, we don’t have a lot of video footage of us playing live, and even less of us playing our own songs. This demo included a lot of covers – all stuff we liked playing. So it’s kind of a freeze-dried sample of our set list from the 80s and 90s. We’ve got three takes of “Sensory Man”, as well as a rehearsal sequence on that song, a couple of takes of “I Hate Your Face”, and one of “Why Not Call It George?” – that’s it for our songs. That is, unless someone out there has video of us playing at Middlebury College or SUNYIT, when we opened for Bloodline. Anybody? Thought not.