Tag Archives: Matt Perry

Usual Rubbish

Funky town.

Did somebody borrow my amp yesterday? If so, I pity them. That thing is a piece of shit. Next time, borrow and amp from someone who knows something about shopping. I myself am a bit out of practice.

Yeah, we of Big Green are back in the broke period, scrounging around for a few extra dollars, sharing leftovers, and hiding from the mailman. Good thing they don’t have bailiffs in this century, because those mothers would be at the door of the Cheney Hammer Mill right now, pounding away, court papers in their sweaty hands. What’s the problem? Simple – we owe. We owe back taxes, we owe for the grocery bill, we owe for the electric bill, and we owe something to pretty much everybody in this funky ass town.

I know what you’re going to say. (I suspect you knew I was going to say that. WHY DO WE EVEN BOTHER TALKING?) You were probably going to ask, why don’t you guys just knuckle down and earn the money to support your lazy asses? Good question. There are as many answers to that as there are losers living in this hammer mill. You see, we follow the squatter’s code: when the bailiffs are closing in on you, hunker down and pretend you’re furniture. If you can imitate a side table long enough, you’ll never have to pay your bills. News you can use, my friends.

Hey, at least you're not on fire.That said, we do have uses for our time. Matt is chasing birds around most of the week, though he does show up regularly to continue our glacial-pace production on the next collection of songs. Marvin (my personal robot assistant) has been taking an automaton sabbatical these last couple of weeks. (His battery pack has been removed and put on a deep charger. We may end up having to jump start him like a ’95 Buick LeSabre.) Mitch Macaphee has taken off to check on his property in orbit around Proxima Centauri (Proxima b) – he’s gotten very jumpy now that the astronomers have stumbled onto that little piece of celestial real estate. Not sure what he’s been doing up there.

So … just another week in funky town. I may have another “Wayback Wednesday” in me to close out the summer – wait and see.

Usual Rubbish

Poditosis.

All right, then. Time for the now quarterly ritual – that of passing the podcast from one computer to another and listening to it until we collapse from incoherent self-amusement. That’s what I call “Friday”.

I know, THIS IS BIG GREEN is late once again. I would use summer as an excuse, but you know that’s lame. We NEVER take summers off – just ask the missus. I would use old age as an excuse, but hell … we’ve been old since we started the podcast, and it used to be monthly, so what gives? Well … other stuff tends to get in the way. Matt has his various jobs, columns, reports, and committees to deal with. I’ve got my day job, night duties, plus the Cutty Sark model that I’ve been building in the dark for 12 years, etc. (Apologies to Graham Chapman for lifting that.)

Then there’s the freaking play, of course – Ned Trek, which takes up the bulk of our creative time … writing it, editing it, toasting it, spreading margarine all over it, then recording the voices, editing the audio, chucking in the alley, flying kites for six days, etc., until the show emerges from the butt end of this long and alimentary-like process. There’s got to be a better way, right? Well, if there is, I have yet to hear about it. What the hell … we’re not good.

Where's that podcast? I don't effin' know!Simultaneous to this production schedule is our music production schedule, which involves writing, tracking, and mixing songs using stone knives and bearskins. (The kind of primitive tools used in the late 1990s, early 2000s, before time began.) We’ve got a start on two new songs thus far in this cycle, likely destined for a future Ned Trek episode. They’re ridiculous enough, let’s put it that way. Then there’s an oldies project we got a start on, not to mention the omnibus Ned Trek song collection we plan to release at some point before we keel over. (Better start picking up the pace on some of these projects. I’m feeling kind of woozy.)

Anywho, I expect you’ll see a new THIS IS BIG GREEN episode drop later this week. Don’t quote me – I am notoriously unreliable.

Usual Rubbish

Toast terrific.

Damn it. Misplaced my breakfast again. Third time this morning. I definitely need more sleep. If anybody trips over some cold toast and a half-empty mug of tea, drop me a line.

We keep odd hours here in the cohort of collectivists known as Big Green. Matt, the naturalist in the group, is up at all hours chasing after critters, feeding them, changing their diapers, keeping them safe from the elements. That’s a slight exaggeration, but only slight – the guy is attempting to single-handedly make up for all of the injustices meted out by god and man. Kind of time-consuming. Me? I am the unnaturalist in the group. When I am outside, I think to myself … “This is too strange for us, Hanar. We are creatures of outer space. We long for the comforting closeness of walls.”

Okay, if I’m paraphrasing classic Star Trek, I must be a little groggy. (Too much grog, perhaps.) I’m up late at night in the lab, sometimes. Did I say lab? I meant studio. Cranking up the keyboard, jamming along with drum loops, listening to old recordings and occasionally committing something to disc. Then I’ll climb the stairs to my bedroom and get halfway through a decent night’s sleep before Mitch Macaphee detonates some weakly controlled “experiment” in his lab (yes, lab), shaking the walls of the abandoned Cheney Hammer Mill to their very foundations. We’re not so different, Mitch and me. Profoundly sleep-deprived. Trying to make loud noises using sophisticated instruments. Nearly bringing the house down on our heads.

Lincoln, did you steal my toast?One of my obsessions of late has been rebuilding our YouTube site. That’s my hobby, if you will, until Matt returns from Peregrine Falcon watch. (To catch up with him, see his Falcon Watch blog.) We don’t have a lot of video to post as of late, but we do have archival material that may be of interest to those who have limped along after Big Green for lo these many years. I will drop a note to all and sundry when I launch the new YouTube channel. There will be a few takes from an old video demo in there, most likely, along with our usual compliment of strange videos.

Okay, down goes the toast. Turn the keys up to eleven. And Mitch is back in the lab, so … boom goes the dynamite.